Early Saturday morning our local Veterinarian stopped by the house. He thought he'd check on a prolapsed heifer we've been nursing. Well, I asked how he'd been. He said "Pretty good" and kinda grinned. Well I knew something else was on his mind. Then, he and that handsome farmer hubby dude of mine went to work setting up to take a look at that heifer. I bided my time and waited. I knew he'd spill the beans sooner or later. After a few minutes he said " Let me tell yall what I got into the other day". I pulled up a bucket and sat down. I knew this might take a minute or two. So the story went like this:
Seems like he was invited a few weeks back to speak at a 4th grade class meeting of some sort at one of the elementary schools. He was running behind as usual that day and hadn't given much thought to what he would speak about. So he got there, grabbed a few things outta his truck and ran into the gymnasium. The entire 4th grade class was patiently (ahem) waiting. Now, he is naturally a man of few words. So I would have loved to have been a fly on that wall. Well, he ambled up to a podium and looked over at one of the teachers. She just smiled and nodded. So he cleared his throat and tapped the mic and started to speak. Well the darn thang started squealing and squawking like a stuck pig. The darling little teacher ran up and adjusted it somehow, smiled, sat back down and he started again.
Well he said he started talking about how important a good education is and the more he talked the louder the children became. He said, I could see that I was losing their attention fast. So I pulled out a few instruments and that settled them back down. He said they were "Kinda like a swarm of bees, one wrong move and I'd be running for the door". So he talked about what he used these different instruments for. He is mostly a large animal vet. We have a different one for pets etc.. Anyway, he talked a little more and turned to look at the teacher hoping he was done. She motioned for him to continue. So he pulled something else outta the bag and talked some more. Then turned and looked at her again. She smiled and nodded. Then Hallelujah! she stood up and walked to the mic.
"Lets give the Dr. a round of applause to show our appreciation. " she said. Whew, he said I made through that and was about to head for the door when she said." Now, the Dr will answer a few questions".He stopped dead still in his tracks and walked back to the mic. (Oh boy I thought, he's in trouble now.) Well he answered a few simple questions and then a little boy stood up and said " One time you came to the house and had to take a calf out of our cows' belly! " He thought uh-oh here comes the real questions. The little boy continued" I just wanted to tell you it's doing good and I play with it alot!"
Whew! Now if you knew our Vet you would know just how relieved he was. But before he could regain his senses, a little girl asked him,
"How do you get the kittens out when the mama can't?" Uh-oh! He said he just just stood there and looked at her with his mouth hanging open, then turned and looked at the teacher. She smiled and nodded, again. So, he said "I cleared my throat, felt my neck burning and ringing in my ears. I reached in my bag and pulled out a few instruments and very lightly explained how we do a Cesarean Section". (omg!) Now all the children were sitting there with their mouths hanging open! The darling little teacher jumped up and ran to the mic with a horrified look on her face and asked for applause again! Then the little girl stood up again and said, "but I didn't get my answer"! Well he looked at the teacher and the teacher looked at him and she asked the little girl "What do you mean honey?"
And the little girl said " I just wanted to know how to get the kittens out from under the porch!"
Oh my yall! I laughed at him till I cried. He said I sure did learn something from that little girl that day. "Not to make things so complicated!" Poor fella!
I hope yall enjoyed my little story! Have a great day and remember "Not to make things so complicated!"
have fun yall!